My spiritual journey has been going on for 5 years now, give or take a few months. In the beginning it started with me being sick of the way things were and realizing there had to be another way to do things. So I dived into every self help book out there- every book that told me what to do to live a happy life. I would do the exercises like a determined student with homework. And then, I didn’t really see changes. Slight changes maybe, but nothing that I considered of any re

I never had the thought that I had to know where my blood came from to know who I was. I never had the desire to look up my birth-parents. I really have all of the information to piece it together. I have a lot more than most people do. I have a letter from my birth mother telling me her full name and the name of the man she was marrying (not my birth-father). I have the first name of my full-brother. My mom always told me I could look up my birth mother or brother if I wante

I lost my will to question most things when I was 4. As soon as my dad died I had no more questions. The big wonder of ‘why?’ didn’t matter to me anymore. I didn’t care why he died, I just knew he was dead. Cynicism hit me because I felt broken without even knowing how to process little feelings let alone big ones like sheer grief. I was shattered into a million pieces that took a while to pick up and glue back together. A very long while. Growing up pretty religious until th

Expectations are truly interesting. The fact that my human mind can come up with so many situations and scenarios based on absolutely no truth or exaggerations of the truth is really cool. Our imaginations are so powerful that they can really come up with anything, things that are SO bizarre or extreme based on one subconscious seed that was planted recently or way back before we can even remember having thoughts. It’s magical really. But when I’m in the midst of anxiety it d

• I was always searching for something outside of myself to give me my big AHA moments. I drowned myself in books and followed many paths that were laid out in teachings to try and reach what the authors/teachers were talking about. I had glimpses of knowledge for sure, universal truths that I believed to be true, but never really KNEW them, like truly knew them, because I hadn’t FULLY experienced them. Like I said, I had glimpses but they were alway short-lived. And that’s o