I have been pretty down on myself lately. And it’s not because anything majorly bad has happened OR that I am not doing a lot, I am actually doing more than ever before. I’ve been placing this very harsh pressure on myself that I should be somewhere else… I should be more accomplished, I should’ve followed my intuition more and earlier so I could be “further along” by now.
The truth of the matter is that we are exactly where we are supposed to be, always.
This fact is at times hard to believe. It’s easy to get caught up in all the shoulda coulda, wouldas. I lived in those for a lot of years and they’ve been creeping back up recently.
I’ve been here before: where I feel like I am lost when I am actually just experiencing some resistance and getting stuck in it. I am not lost, I am actually more “found” than ever even when it doesn’t feel that way.
All the healing I have done over the years has allowed me to be right here in this moment and given me the ability to step outside of my feelings or “lows” even when I don’t feel great. I am able to disassociate and view them from an outside perspective more clearly than every before. But I am also human and human stuff can be hard sometimes.
I was letting myself get wrapped up in the everyday stuff that stresses me out. I was getting caught up in the idea that I should be living my dream life when my dream life is actually here right now if I am open enough to see it.
This weekend I had a full day to myself, the first time in over 6 MONTHS(!!!!!) It was glorious and much needed. It also gave me a new sense of clarity of what I need to do for me, and how I need to consistently show up by taking action (which includes rest) that serves my highest good.
I am realizing in an entirely new and exciting way that life is unfolding as it should, and I am along for the ride. I attended a free healing session that I found in a facebook group. I had a zoom call this morning for a mentor-ship program with someone I truly admire. I am attending a women’s circle on Wednesday, a new moon ceremony with friends on Friday, a free fall webinar led by the beautiful soul who offered the healing session to me last week, and a podcast class zoom with the Almost 30 hosts (total fan girl here, as I have a podcast myself). These opportunities came to me because I was open to them and choosing to allow them into my experience.
I am realizing that there is support ALL around me and I am leaning into change and growth. Instead of being a bully to myself (this was the focal point of my healing session BTW), I am choosing to be my own best friend and surround myself with smart, beautiful, talented, and open souls that are aligned with mine.
My life isn’t over and I am not behind – I am just getting started and it’s a beautiful journey (and ugly, and awesome, and terrible…. alllll the contrast).
I am seeing how life is exciting with all of the unknowns. I am not afraid of not reaching my potential anymore because I am realizing day by day that there are truly no limits except for my own mindset.
I am making the decision to stop being a prisoner to my past and starting saying YES to opportunity, connection, and most important of all – ME.
I know that a magical experience and beautiful life is here and now, and true & divine expansion is just around the corner, and it’s my decision on whether or not I want to step around the bend and into the unknown or stay small.
I’m choosing to take the BIG leap. No more playing small. That is not good enough anymore, and all it takes is a choice – choosing YOU and choosing to dream and live big. I choose to step into my power and I choose to create the life I deserve to live – which is a pretty fricken amazing one.
You deserve all the things you want. Go out and get them. It’s all a choice and you are a few decisions away from a truly AMAZING life.
Take the leap & the universe will catch you.